Beyond Dreams Bonus Scene

Harlow 

“I wanna grow up and have a big family,” my oldest son said as nonchalantly as if he was picking his next crayon. It was my favorite time of day. The twins had already ravaged lunch and disappeared to play. Nathan tended to linger over his meals, which gave me some alone time with him. 

“A big family, huh?” 

“Mmhmm.” He nodded, his sweet face lighting up. “Lots of kids.” 

I cocked my head as I gathered plates to carry to the sink. “How many is lots?” 

“Like five. No…six. Actually fourteen. That’s my favorite number.” 

My eyebrows hit my hairline. “You want fourteen kids?” 

“Yeah. It’ll be awesome. Like Christmas at Nana’s house.” 

I did some quick math and realized that was how many kids showed up to our family gatherings. Between my brothers and their wives having kids, plus Joe’s four kids, well, the energy at Mom’s on the holidays was intense. 

“We have so much fun.” Nathan grinned, staring into the distance as he imagined the scene. “Just playing and laughing the whole time.” 

I placed the dishes in the sink and leaned on the counter. “But what about fighting? I seem to remember a few doozies.” 

“Well yeah, that’s no fun,” he said with a frown. “Like that time Micah told me I was an alien because I have red hair.” 

Eli and Hope’s son Micah was sweet as could be…when he wasn’t stirring up trouble. I wasn’t surprised in the least to hear this story. 

“Your dad has red hair.” 

Nathan considered my words then dismissed them with a shake of his head. “Yeah, but no one else does.” 

“Your cousin Angela. Aunt Cat. Even Nana has red hair.” I lift a finger with each name, holding back a smile as my six-year old’s brows drew together.  

“Why did Micah say that then?” 

Collin stepped into the room, looking more handsome than the day I married him. He’d stopped touring and made music for fun, not money. As the stress of performing bled away, happiness seeped in and it suited him. A lot. 

“There’s two of my favorite people.” He paused as he took in the atmosphere. “You two talking about something important?” 

“Nater Tot just informed me he wants to have fourteen kids when he grows up.” 

“Fourteen!” Collin looked mildly terrified. “That’s…” 

“Just like all the cousins he has,” I finished with a knowing smile. 

Understanding dawned on my husband’s face. “Right.” 

His slow smile still set butterflies loose in my stomach. Collin West lived up to every promise of excellence he ever made. 

I tucked myself into my husband’s arms, my happy place. “And they all have so much fun together, except for when Micah makes fun of his hair.” 

“Yeah, but, I’m not the only one with red.” Nathan leaned his elbows on the table and twiddled his hair around a finger. “I think Micah just likes being a turd.” 

“Sometimes, yeah,” I said, crossing the room to press a kiss into my son’s head, “but we won’t ever say that to him, now will we?” 

Nathan shook his head. “Not unless he makes me real real mad.” 

Collin pulled out a chair and sat next to his son. “Have you thought much about how you’re going to take care of that many kids?” 

“Well…” Nathan tapped a finger to his chin, head tilted, considering. “I don’t think I’d try and hold them all at the same time…” 

He looked so serious, it was all I could do not to laugh. “I think Daddy wants to know how you’re going to buy them all the food and clothes they’ll need.” 

“And toys!” Nathan lifted a finger, his little face lighting up at the suggestion. 

“Yep. Of course they’ll have to have toys.” I pulled out the chair next to Collin and sat. “And that’s a big house you’re gonna need.” 

Nathan bobbed his head, considering the question carefully. “I thought I might be an astronaut when I grow up. Would that make enough money to buy them all the toys?” 

“An astronaut?” Collin widened his eyes, shaking his head in surprise. 

“Yeah. Or maybe a lion tamer. But mostly I want to be a daddy.” Nate cupped Collin’s cheeks. “Like you.” 

While my husband beamed with pride, our oldest hopped down from the table and scampered away. “I’m gonna go play with Maren now! And probably Joshua too but sometimes he doesn’t like to play our games.” 

“That had to feel good.” I turned to my husband, who leaned his elbows on the table, staring after Nater Tot with a wistful smile. 

“What? Learning my boy wants to have fourteen kids then abandon them to chase after his dream of seeing the earth from space? Or getting eaten by a lion…?” He laughed, turning his focus to me. “Maybe you can write that into your next book.” 

“Sure. Yep. That’ll be a great follow up to the fictionalized adventures of my family. Major Nathan Hutton, proudly fighting space lions while fathering an entire generation of the family all by himself.” 

“He’d be good at it though.” 

“Fighting space lions?” 

“No. Being a dad. Raising a family. He’s kind. Patient. A born leader. The twins love him to death.” 

Nathan, Maren, and Joshua darted past the doorway, giggling like crazy. “And Josh would spend his whole day in his room if it wasn’t for Nate talking him into trying new things.” 

“Exactly. Though, if we’re looking at Christmas presents for fourteen grandchildren, I might need to put out another album.” Collin laughed lightly, shaking his head at the absurdity of it all. 

“Probably closer to twenty after Maren and Joshua get done. Maybe thirty.” I blew a puff of air past pursed lips. “Good God. I definitely need to get cracking on that next book and it’s gonna have to be a bestseller.” 

“It will be. You’re so talented.” My husband took my hand and brought it to his lips for a kiss. “So good at what you do.” 

The last several years with him had been as magical as our first couple months together, touring the world while we fell in love. Maybe even more so because we knew each other so much better than we did then. We could anticipate the moods and desires of the other. I loved being married to him. 

“Do you remember when we were in Rome?” I asked. “When you told me all you ever wanted was to be a dad?” 

“I remember every moment with you with perfect clarity.” The twinkle in his eyes said he was trying to make me swoon. 

I could never let him know it worked or he’d spend the rest of the day cocky and full of himself. “Uh-huh. Right. Real smooth.” 

“No. It’s true. You came into my life like this ray of light, freeing me from all the…crap…that came with fame. You’re like a prism, focusing my energy into one sole purpose.” 

And wouldn’t you know. I swooned anyway. 

“And what’s that?” I asked. “Your purpose.” 

“You. Them. Figuring out how I’m going to provide for thirty grandkids.” He stood, pulling me out of my chair and into his arms. He swayed, humming the melody to a song he wrote for me while we were on tour.  

As he hummed, I sang, quietly. “Time is a harsh mistress. An ice princess. Keeping me away from you. Cruel seconds slash my soul. Deeply, darkly, down I roll. Until, sweet girl, your love…proves…true…” 

“We were in Rome,” Collin said softly. “Sitting at the café in front of the Colosseum, talking about how easy it would be to grow used to its magnificence. How we all go blind to the beauty existing in our lives every day.” 

I smiled because for all his romantic sweetness, he really did remember. “You told me you’d right the wrongs of your childhood through your kids.” 

Collin nodded, resting his head on mine and holding me close.  

“You’re doing it,” I said, pulling back to meet his gaze. “Every day, our kids are happy and healthy and so strong. They know that if anything goes wrong, you’ve got their back.” 

“I hope so. And I hope they continue to feel that way as they get older.” 

“They do. They will.” 

“How can you be so sure?” 

“Because I know you. I see you. As your wife, I see who you’re growing into and my goodness…it’s beautiful. I’m honored to share my life with you.” 

“You’re laying it on a little thick, don’t you think?” Collin said with a roll of his eyes. “I’m the one who’s good at making you swoon, remember? 

“I’m being honest.” Tears pricked my eyes and my husband cupped my cheek. 

“Babe. What’s wrong?” 

I swallowed hard and took his hands. “I have something to tell you. Something we weren’t prepared for, but, you know, that’s the way these things go…” 

Collin furrowed his brow, stepping back. I could see it in his eyes. He’d already figured out what I had to say, but didn’t want to jump to conclusions. “What are you saying, Harlow?” 

“I’m saying our family is getting bigger.” I shrugged, smiling as tears of happiness flowed.  

“You’re…” 

I nodded. “Pregnant.” 

His jaw dropped. “We’ve been trying so long, I’d almost given up hope.” 

After Maren and Joshua were born, we’d been careful to use contraceptives. With Nater Tot still in diapers, plus two infants who definitely inherited their father’s independent attitude, we had a lot going on and not enough energy to go around. But in the years that followed, we realized we still had a lot of love to give. That energy abounds if you know where to look for it. 

So we started trying again. Nothing big. We simply stopped using contraceptives. If a baby happened, then it was meant to be. It had taken so long, we’d decided that we were a three child family.  

But now… 

Now… 

Collin put his hand on my belly, smiling as if he could already feel the life growing there. “What if it’s twins again?” For half a second, he looked dreamily happy, but then fear flashed through his eyes. “Oh shit. Harlow. What if it’s twins again?” 

“Then we’ll be one step closer to living Nater Tot’s dream.” I’d gone through the same series of questions myself as I’d stared at the positive pregnancy test. Raising Maren and Joshua had been a trial by fire, but we were better for it. Closer for it. “If it’s twins again, you know the family will step in. We didn’t have to do it alone the first time and we won’t do it alone the second time. If there’s a second time.” 

“I’m so excited. I swear, Lo. Every day I think I’ve hit my limit of happiness, and then you do something, or they do something and I…our life is beautiful. Just so fucking beautiful. We’re like that waiter at the café by the Colosseum, except I’m not blind to the beauty. You. This house. Our kids. Our family. This is…I mean…growing up, I never knew life could be this good. I thought I’d find fulfillment by being famous. By selling out stadiums and having my music streaming to billions of ears. But I did that, and it was hollow, but this…” He put his hands on my belly. “This is awe-inspiring. This is…this is my reason, babe. You are my reason. You, them, this…this is why I was put on this earth. To live and learn and grow with you.” 

Tears welled in my eyes and I wiped them away, smiling as my husband’s words filled my heart. “I love you, husband.” 

“I adore you, wife.” 

A loud crash came from the living room, followed by howling laughter from Joshua, a shocked gasp from Maren, and Nater Tot’s low voice, whispering in that calming way of his. “That wasn’t very nice Joshua, and now we have a big mess to clean up, but if we work together, we can get it done.” 

“Sometimes I think he’s a saint,” I whispered to Collin. “How is he only six and has that much patience? That much wisdom?” 

“You get it done,” Joshua replied with all the snark a four-year-old could muster. 

“We have to work together!” hollered Nate. 

“Guys, don’t fight,” Maren pleaded, then gasped as the sound of a smack resonated through the living room. 

A few stunned seconds of silence disintegrated in a yowl of anger from Joshua. “Dadda! Momma! Nater Tot hit me!” 

“So maybe not a saint,” I said with a laugh as we headed into the living room to diffuse the situation. When we walked in, Nathan had his little hand on Joshua’s cheek, bending down to look him in the eye. 

“I’m so sorry, Joshua. So sorry. That was such a mistake.” When he met our gaze, his eyes were filled with tears. “I didn’t mean to get so mad…” 

“Joshua said his tower was dumb and called him a dumbhead then knocked it all down and a block hit Nater Tot on the head and it clonked so loud I heard it,” Maren said, a laugh twisting her lips. “It was pretty funny.” 

Nathan started laughing, and Joshua followed suit. “It was pretty funny.” 

I stood there, with my hand on my belly, love for my family coursing through me. I’d do anything for these people and knew, without a shadow of a doubt, they felt the same way about me. This, us, this was my happily ever after.